"Do you have hiccups?" Child aged 5

Up until three or four years ago, I never found stammering particularly frustrating. I was always of the mindset that I had bigger fish to fry and therefore didn't really pay much attention to my speech. But as I went to uni, my stammer changed, I don't like saying it got worse but it was definitely stronger and there were days when I just couldn't get words out as opposed to just stuttering now and then. This has been the case now for the last three years. The thing is, I know that going to university was inevitably going to cause a part of my condition to be affected as it was such a big change but I can't sit back and think 'oh well, that's life'. It is hugely frustrating and now affects every conversation that I enter into. At times, it makes me not want to start speaking because I know I'll have to keep stopping. The most annoying thing is that I cannot feel frustrated about it because this feeling makes it stronger so I pretend to myself that it's fine.
People often think I am 'more disabled' than I am because of my speech. This affects me more than words can describe. I don't think many people realise that lots of people equate wheelchair with learning difficulty and that for most of my childhood, when I met new people, I would be spoken to as if I were two and I know that if I spoke fluently, this stereotype would quickly be dismissed. I wish I didn't think this, but I am constantly looking for ways to make myself 'more normal' to fit into mainstream life and society. Stammering for me goes against this need.
I think it's also difficult because there aren't clear triggers and it doesn't happen when I'm nervous (a common misconception of stammering) nor am I clear in my head about whether its linked to, caused or perpetuated by having Cerebral Palsy.
I'm also still trying to find ways to explain it to children when they ask 'do you have hiccups' or 'can you not talk properly' but this is hard to do when I cannot even understand it fully myself!
Just a little advice: I couldn't do a blog on stammering without mentioning that I hate when people finish off my sentences for me. I am not the only stammeree who feels this way so please don't be tempted to do it. I know it's hard to watch someone struggle to get words out but it just adds to the frustration and makes me feel inadequate. There is more to life than speaking quickly (I just wish I'd listen to my own advice)

"Do you sleep in that in your bed?" Child aged 4

For me, having Cerebral Palsy is sometimes like having something missing. There are times that I think however happy I feel, being disabled will reduce this feeling-it will in some ways always make me sad but there are other times when I hardly think about it. I sometimes feel a sense of grief for myself that I never walked and that I will never be totally independent and I wonder what life would have been like if I had. But I do not allow myself to dwell on this for too long because it would ruin my life. I am not bitter nor am I resentful towards my situation. People often say to me 'you must think, why me' but I never do. I do not like this type of attitude because I find it quite self- indulgent. I was born with a condition and I have to get on with my life. My goal is and always has been to achieve my own personal best and concentrate on how to make life easier. I can't say that I never think about what could have been or about how nice it would be to not have a disability but I have lots of good things in my life and I tend to focus on those.